Bridging the Gap: Helping parents navigate the digital world

Back in the day, children were warned to be wary of strangers lurking in the shadows, someone who could approach them when they were alone and vulnerable. Today, those threats still exist, but they’ve moved from the streets and playgrounds to the digital world. Predators now hide behind screens and made-up identities on the internet. And while the “bad man” from yesteryear might have seemed suspicious, sending red flags to those who noticed him, today’s predators often come across as kind, caring, and empathetic, gaining a child’s trust by making them feel seen, heard, and special.

It was during her time as a program facilitator with Children and Family Services Western (CFS Western) that Valerie Caldwell recognized the growing need for parents and children to understand the online world. “This concern was being brought up during a number of parenting sessions,” Caldwell explained. “I brought it to my supervisor, who directed myself and another facilitator to create a presentation for adults. It was during those sessions that the question arose – who is educating the kids on this topic?”

With the support of her mentor, Marilyn Sterling-Blanco, Caldwell developed presentations for Grade 5–8 students across the CFS Western Region. “The sessions became extremely popular,” Caldwell said. “So we then expanded to Grade 9–12 students, which were also very well received.” After Sterling-Blanco’s passing, a new supervisor dismissed the program, calling it “a little Facebook presentation.” Caldwell, determined to continue, branched out on her own and never looked back.

This determination led to the creation of Bridging the Gap, a program designed to help parents understand online risks and guide their children safely through the digital world. Caldwell has since educated thousands of students, parents, caregivers, and professionals across Saskatchewan and Manitoba. She has earned recognition from numerous organizations, including Hockey Manitoba, where she presents to all U15 AAA male and female players, and the Canadian Sexual Exploitation Summit. Caldwell has also been hired to conduct seminars at every school in the Prairie Spirit School Division, tailoring presentations to be age-appropriate, engaging, and thought-provoking.

While public speaking is a large part of her work, most of Caldwell’s hours are spent on the web, researching the latest apps, websites, and trends to stay ahead and ensure she is passing accurate, current information to families. Children of the “Internet Police,” Caldwell’s own two children had no access to technology early on; they didn’t get their first iPod until age 13, and didn’t receive a phone until they were driving. And they were limited to an hour a day on their devices.

Despite these strict rules, her son was still a victim when he received child sexual abuse images on the app KIK at age 13. It was the event which lead to Caldwell’s ongoing collaborations with Gord Olson of the RCMP’s ICE (Internet Child Exploitation) Unit. “We (Olson and I) have collaborated several times over the years. I am always able to reach out to ICE for help and guidance and have put many kids and families in touch with them for assistance,” she said.

During her recent presentation in Cartwright, Caldwell offered parents and caregivers practical advice for keeping children safe online. Her number one recommendation: never allow your child to take their device to bed, and she strongly encourages parents to lead by example. “Children are spending an average of over eight hours a day on screens, often sacrificing sleep,” she said. “Adults are not far behind. Technology has gravely affected mental health and contributed to the rise of sleep deprivation. These kids need a break, talk to them and explain why sleep is so important. Everyone should leave their device in another room.”

Another chilling point Caldwell made: cell phones have no place in private spaces, these “digital doorways” are no different than leaving a door open in your child’s room.

She also highlighted popular social media apps, websites, and trends that youth are currently engaged with, from games and messaging apps that seem harmless, to platforms that carry hidden risks. She encouraged parents to actively discuss online interactions with their children, maintain open lines of communication, and set clear boundaries and expectations.

While educating children about safe digital behaviour is vital, Caldwell stresses that parental awareness is just as important. “The goal is not to scare parents, but to empower them,” she said. “Take an active interest in what your kids are doing. Learn the platforms they are on and find out how to set privacy settings.

Programs like Bridging the Gap help close the digital divide between generations, providing knowledge and practical tools to help children thrive while staying safe in an increasingly connected world. “I don’t want people leaving here feeling fear; I want them to feel informed and to create a network of support for their children.”

Just as Caldwell intended, the audience of 25 left the presentation not only more informed, but also with a deeper understanding of the constant barrage of pressures youth face today. She closed with one final piece of advice. “If a child ever comes to you and confides something difficult, never respond with, “I’m disappointed in you,” or, “You know better.” Instead, praise them for their honesty, thank them for trusting you, and contact ICE at 1-204-843-129 for guidance and support.”

PHOTO CAPTION: Public Speaker and advocate of online safety gave an eye opening presentation to a group of 25 parents, educators and care givers. This is one of four community presentations being held in the Prairie Spirit School Division during November. Her mantra is “One kid at a time” but these presentations are making a positive impact to so many more. At the close of her presentation in Cartwright, a hand rose up during the Q & A segment; she did not have a question, she did however have a heartfelt and sincere comment, “I just want you to know that you are saving so many children, what you are doing is making a huge impact and I want to thank you for that!”. PHOTO SUBMITTED